Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) is often assumed to be a syndrome that only effects youth. However, about 70% of children with ADD/ADHD are likely to carry symptoms into adulthood. Many of these adults will eventually enter into romantic relationships, and even marriage. What often arises then is an entirely different set of ADD/ADHD-related difficulties associated with being part of a couple.

How ADD/ADHD Affects Couples

To understand how ADD/ADHD strains a relationship, it can be helpful to know at least a few of the common manifestations. People with adult ADD/ADHD can suffer from a wide variety of symptoms including the following:

• Inability to focus attention for relatively long periods of time
• Social awkwardness
• Spacing out - often in the middle of a conversation or task.
• High susceptibility to stress, forgetfulness, poor follow-through, frequent lateness, impulsiveness, irritability/short-temper, and/or restlessness.

How Couples Counseling Can Help

In spite of the challenges, adult ADD/ADHD does not have to spell disaster for a relationship. There are many ways to cope with ADD while maintaining a successful relationship.

Some strategies that are often discussed include the following:

• Inability to focus attention for relatively long periods of time
• Social awkwardness
• Spacing out - often in the middle of a conversation or task.
• High susceptibility to stress, forgetfulness, poor follow-through, frequent lateness, impulsiveness, irritability/short-temper, and/or restlessness.

I often see that people with ADD/ADHD make dynamic, thoughtful, caring and devoted partners. Couples counseling can be useful for helping both partners to focus on their positive traits as well as developing strategies on how to address the problem within the context of the relationship.