The Gottman approach is goal-oriented and the intervention strategies are based upon empirical data from the Gottmans' work with more than 3,000 couples. Gottmans' research revealed not only what makes up a long-term healthy couple relationship, but what can spell the demise of it. The Gottman approach is designed to help you and your spouse or partner:

• Increase respect, affection, and closeness.
• Break through and resolve conflict when you feel stuck.
• Generate greater understanding between you and your partner.
• Keep conflict and discussions calm.
• Maintain improvements in your relationship.

These goals are based on the belief that to make a relationship last, couples must become better friends, learn to manage conflict, and create ways to support each other's hopes for the future. Couples can accomplish this by paying attention to what the Gottmans call the seven principles of healthy coupleships:

1. Build love maps. According to the Gottmans, this principle asks how well you know your partner’s inner psychological world, such as his or her history, worries, stresses, joys, and hopes.
2. Share fondness and admiration. According the Gottman approach, contempt is the kiss of death in a couples' relationship. The antidote for contempt is sharing affection and respect within a relationship.
3. Turn towards. This principle is based on stating your needs, and becoming aware of bids for connection and turning towards them. Small moments of everyday life present opportunities to build a stronger relationship.
4. The Positive Perspective. Focusing on a positive approach to problem-solving increase the chances of success of repairing relationship problems.
5. Manage Conflict. The Gottman Approach focuses on "managing" conflict as opposed to "resolving" conflict. This is because relationship conflict is a natural occurrence with functional, positive aspects.
6. Make Life Dreams Come True. In a couples' relationship, it is important to create an atmosphere that encourages each person to communicate honestly about his or her hopes, values, convictions, and aspirations.
7. Create Shared Meaning. In order to see the couples' relationship as a team, the couple must share important visions, narratives, myths, and metaphors about their relationship.